Home
I've just finished teaching my last ever class at Sussex University. Granted, I was the TA, not the full teacher, but still, they were my class, and I taught them. They were a good lot, maybe not the fastest workers, maybe not the sharpest minds (though some of them were damn hot).
I've taught Real-Time Embedded Systems, Advanced Microprocessor Systems, Computer Networks, Advanced Network Technologies and High-Level Integrated Circuit Design in my time, and had generally good results from my classes. These are all courses I've studied, and as the wheel turned I was asked to teach or TA them. I did so happily. Knowledge-Transfer is something I'm apparently quite good at, so long as my students are willing to learn.
But now that's it. We've moved to Brighton Uni, where we currently have no teaching responsibilities, and I'll probably leave the department before that changes (it'll change in the new school year, most likely, and my contract runs out on the 30th of September). No more teaching for me. I don't think I'd want to teach full-time, but I'm going to miss it nonetheless.
As for the title, well, that's kind of how we left Sussex Uni altogether, I think. Snuck out the back door while everyone else was looking elsewhere: there are people in the Engineering School Office who are surprised to hear we're leaving, never mind that we've left and the rooms we used to occupy have been stripped.
I spent ten years of my life in that university, most of them in that building. I helped get the cafe installed (I even repaired their fridge and coffee machine when they broke down). I helped rebuild the uni radio station pretty much from the ground up. I helped save the Chemistry department from closure. I kept the fencing club ticking over by repairing kit and doing admin until we managed to get a committee put together, the year when it all went a bit wrong. I've looked after their minibuses. I've served on their IT Helpdesk. So many memories.
I passed my viva there.
And the last one, likely the most enduring, is slinking away after TAing that lesson, unable to look the students in the eye. Pressing my nose briefly to the glass in the cafe, watching them pack up for the day after all their customers have left, and being unable to open the door and bid the cafe staff farewell.
I'm going to miss the old place. And ... I wonder if my inability to say goodbye is my subconscious being unable to let it go. Time will tell.
When swinging between branches (brachiating!), it is sometimes necessary to let go of one branch before having a hold of the next, in order to bridge a gap slightly larger than you are. I wonder if that's what this lurching feeling in the centre of my chest is.
That was ... oddly less stressful than I'd imagined. Like, a lot.
Today I had my DPhil viva voce examination, and passed with minor corrections (which is normal). This, in itself, was lovely, of course. What was somewhat more lovely was that it was ... almost easy.
The examiners get copies of my thesis a few months before the viva, they read it, then I give a presentation, and they ask questions to make sure that (a) I wrote the thesis, and (b) I understand the field, not just the tiny bit I wrote my thesis on. Apparently, my thesis was written with great clarity, and I answered most of the questions they had in the presentation, so there wasn't too much to say in the end. Most if not all of my corrections are typographical in nature, or requests that I add a little more detail to a given section. In particular, my external examiner told me to stop underplaying my achievements, which was a nice boot-to-the-head piece of perspective after spending five years elbow-deep in this field.
Once the examiners had agreed their verdict, called me back in and shaken me by the hand repeatedly, we all went off for lunch in the cafe and discussed nuclear reactors. All a bit anticlimactic, really ...
I'm now really, really tired, all of a sudden. The next few days I plan on taking very easy, as my brain is entirely toasted at the moment. Back to work properly on Friday, just in time for the weekend.
But yeah. I'm a Doctor, technically (not actually until graduation, of course). How'd that happen?
So, viva prep proceeds apace, aside from a little moment when my internal examiner "reminded" me that it was on Monday the 14th. It appears he can't operate his calendaring software, which is fine: I'd much prefer that to ANOTHER un-notified rescheduling on such short notice.
The presentation is basically written, just needs a little tweaking, then I need to write the prompt cards, then rehearse the damn thing 'til it flows (I hear it's sort of de rigeur to be repeatedly interrupted with questions, and I'm historically quite poor at regathering my threads once interrupted).
I'm kind of annoyed that I've gotten so little done today, but what with following the news in Japan (massive earthquake, possible containment breach in a nuclear reactor, etc), the sudden and heavy cold that has struck me at the worst possible time, WASHING ALL THE THINGS so we can move the drying racks out of the guest room in time for houseguest next week.... there's been no time. It's like being nibbled to death by cats...
Tomorrow I will make the time. Tomorrow I will finish and rehearse the presentation, reread my thesis to ward off unpleasant surprises, and get ready for the week. 's gonna be a tough one.
So, my viva date is finally set for the 15th of March. Which is ... next Tuesday.
So I guess I better get started on my presentation, huh?
(long story, but basically due to Politics and Colliding Calendars, it's been kinda tricky to get a date. It was the 16th for a while, then it got moved to the 22nd, then to early April, so I relaxed a bit, and got on with some of the actual work I'm doing at, y'know, WORK. Then it was the 15th. Drop everything, write ~40 slides, rehearse presentation, flail.)
On the up side, I was footling with my CV the other night, and discovered that done right, the "Experience and past jobs" section I was leaving blank on account of not having left university yet actually holds an awful lot, if you look at it from the right angle. Front-line tech-support, both telephonic and over desk. Systems administration. Contract work for ... certain people. Embedded Systems research, design and implementation. So perhaps my CV isn't as tragic as I thought it was.
That said, I'm revisiting my thesis while prepping this presentation, and it's not as bad as I thought it was, either. Couldn't stand to look at it or read it immediately I'd finished writing, but now? Not so bad.
Maybe there's a lesson in that.
So, people keep asking me to blog, and I'm not about to say no to some free validation and an excuse to rattle on about things, am I? Here we are.
I handed in on schedule, an hour before the deadline and an hour after my labmate Panos. There were 150 pages and change in the final submission, and while it's probably not my absolute best work, it's the best I could do in the time and conditions I had, my supervisor thinks it's good enough and so do my labmates. At this point, I think I have to accept that I'm too close to it to judge it objectively. After five years with my mental microscope focussed on this one, tiny field a lot of my conclusions feel so obvious an infant should be able to draw them: I need to remember that a lot of what I've seen and said is obvious to me purely because of the experience I have. I don't have to worry about it overmuch until the viva now, which is going to be in January of 2011.
My brain ... still feels badly fried. I'm coping better than I was in the few weeks before handin, but I'm still pretty weak and lethargic. I'm sleeping a lot and having difficulty focussing, which will hopefully change as I drag my sleeping and eating and exercise patterns back towards normal. This, too, will pass: I can only hope it does so quickly.
The week ahead should be interesting: for one, I have two days to do something I originally planned to do in seven, because I messed up the calendar and something that I had listed for next week is in fact taking place this week. This is going to be ... difficult, but I believe it can be done. My only concern is that it's going to eat what little brainpower I have available, and leave me a wreck when I get home again. I'd only just gotten past that. I could really, really, use a break.